Who has read the book, Heaven is for Real? I read this book over Christmas when my brother-in-law brought it over one night. It changed the way I think about Heaven. Let me go back to December 1.
My morning started with this...
so these were greeting Mark on the porch when he came home from Arista...
and then a few days later, we were driving and happened to see this sign and jumped out real quick to take a picture with it...
We told our families and a few close friends and then hopped on a plane to Dallas for Christmas looking forward with much anticipation to another 'harvest baby' :)
A couple weeks later, on December 21, Mark and I went to see his cousin, an OB/GYN in Dallas to get the first glimpse of baby #3. Although we didn't get to see anything. I had miscarried. I was devastated. After talking to Richard, Mark's cousin, we decided that he would do a D&C a few days after Christmas. So on December 28, I checked into the surgery center and had my operation.
I don't want to dwell on this post any longer than I have to but there are a few things I want to remember and most of all, be THANKFUL for during this difficult time.
- I'm so thankful I was in Dallas and with my family. Only God could have known what was going to happen and He timed it perfectly.
- I'm incredibly thankful for Richard. He walked through the whole process with me. He and his family are so special to Mark and me and I knew that I was in great hands.
- I decided to let people know about my miscarriage, so I posted it on FB. Mark thought I was nuts but I realized that the more people that know, the more people that would pray. After all, this is now who I am. It's part of my story. I want to be able to encourage friends the way my friends encouraged me. Within seconds of posting on FB, wall notes, private messages, texts and phone calls started showing up. I was BEYOND blessed by each person who shared with me scripture, personal stories, and prayers. It was amazing to me how many people I know who had also experienced a loss, sometimes losses like mine.
- There is so much more to write but I'll end with this. I'm changed because of the book, my brother-in-law, Luke, gave me the night I realized we had lost the baby. Heaven is for Real. I had known about the book but had never read it. I read it in 2 days. If you haven't read the book, please read it. It's about a little 4 year old boy who meets Jesus while he is having an emergency surgery. There is one part in the book where the little boy meets his sister in Heaven. It was his sister who had never been born because of a miscarriage. And that right there makes me even more excited about Heaven. One day, I will get to meet this little person that God chose to have with Him instead of me for a time.
One more thing, really, and then I'll sign off. If anything was made perfectly clear to me, it was this.
God's plan is perfect and who am I to argue or disagree with His plan? Yes, I was sad, yes, I was angry and yes, I was confused but I never questioned His plan. His plan is perfect. His timing is perfect. Regardless of life's disappointments and challenges in the past and regardless of life's challenges in the future, one thing is certain, Jesus is my God and I will choose to praise Him.
