A Word I HATE

I don't HATE many things. I dislike alot of things. But really really HATE, not very many. There is one word in particular that I have been HATING alot lately...
CANCER.
I HATE it. I HATE everything about it. I HATE what it does to a persons body. HATE what it does to the lives of people it effects. HATES that it takes the precious lives of people we love. HATES that it takes up residence in small children. And I REALLY REALLY HATE that it has taken up residence in my dad.

My dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer just a few weeks ago. Seriously, God??? Why him? Why my daddy? Why our family?

My dad is the most amazing man and I have been blessed in a million ways by being his daughter. He is an incredible husband to my mom. He is an incredible dad to Bethany, Jonathan and me. And he is a super incredible papa to Jake and Pierce. He is a man after God's own heart. He, out of all of us, is probably taking his diagnoses the best! He is at complete peace with it. And that only comes from his total trust in Jesus. I have asked him a few times... "dad, are you really ok with this? I mean, when all the lights are off and it's just you, are you really ok? Seriously, dad, really? Reeeaaaaalllllly???" And you know what, he says "yes" every single time without wavering.

My parents have incredible friends. They have been blessed in a thousand ways by all of them. I will never forget the Sunday just a few days after my dad found out (actually the day after Bethany's wedding!) when he told the church that he had cancer. He spent just a few moments at the end of the service talking about it. He finished and one of the elders came to the front to lead everyone in corporate prayer. I bowed my head and then I just happened to look up and I saw about 50 men making their way to the front to gather around my dad. It was a moment that I will never forget.

So now we begin a new journey. Where will you, Jesus, take us? We have choices to make. We all have choices to make. Sure, my dad has a huge choice and decision treatment wise. But all of us have a choice to make. How is this one thing that I HATE so much, how am I going to let it effect me?
Am I angry? YES!
Am I sad? YES!
Am I scared? YES!
But do I trust God? NO QUESTION!
Is God faithful? WITHOUT A DOUBT!
Is He going to walk beside my dad every step of the way? YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT!
Is He going to turn His back on us? NOT FOR ONE SECOND!
Is God good? ALL THE TIME!

I got alot of grief from friends saying that I was in Dallas for so long this spring. :) You know, when I booked my ticket I didn't really think anything about it. But looking back now, if I had been in California the night of Bethany's accident I just could not have bared the thought of being so far away. And if I had been in California when my dad called to tell me he had cancer...There was a reason I was at home! Thank you Jesus for letting me be with my family during those moments!

I added a playlist to my blog. Listen to them. They are 2 incredible songs that I have been singing my little heart out to lately.
One is Healer by Hillsong.
You hold my every moment. You calm my raging seas. You walk with me through fire. And heal all my disease... I trust in You... Nothing is impossible for you... You hold my world in your hands.

The other is All My Praise by Selah.
I will follow You through green pastures
And sing hallelujah to Your Name
I will follow You through dark disaster
And sing hallelujah through the pain

And even in the shadow of death
I will praise You
And even in the valley I will say

Holy, My God
You are worthy of all my praise

I couldn't find the third song I wanted to put on here but go find it yourself and listen to it. It's Faithful One by Selah and it's pretty much incredible!
I walk a narrow road through valleys deep In search of higher ground, on mountains steep And though with feet unsure, I still keep pressing on. For I am guided by the faithful one. Faithful, faithful to the end, My true and precious friend, You have been faithful, Faithful, so faithful to me

Will you join me in praying for my dad? Will you join me in trusting that he will be healed? He is scheduled for surgery on Monday, June 21. After that we will know what our next step is. Thanks dear friends!